Tuesday, February 19, 2008

for now...

i shall make it a quick n short one cz my bb gonna cry soon cz she is turning here n there on her bed now, haha.. cz saw q a few comments so i tink i better write sth ba.

well guys, i went drink tt nite too, i mean fri nite. q bored there cz all toking canto but i can understand abit. appreciate they come too cz they come becz to acc mi. so we toktoktok. someting happened aft hubby joined mi but i shall not say it. it juz sth tt i tot tts it, he will ignore mi again for sth duno. cz aft we went back he nv tok to mi. juz as i tot everything is gonna b bad as usual, we tok like normal again aft goin to get hp tgt cz he nid to change hp n mine juz 'nice' e day be4 start to giv mi prob so i gonna change too.

we tok as usual when we walked to e shop, as if we r back to normal. he ask mi to get same model hp w him though i hesitate cz i dun use touch screen hp, but i jz get it lo since he kp asking. den even we walked back n thru out e whole nite, we realli back to normal till now, e very moment i m writing e blog.

actually i owas been complaining abt him. but when i tink to it, he did change better for e baby aldy. juz tt its not much n fast enuf. n for e guy i noe him frm day 1 till now, he did become more matured in his way. juz tt if u compare to others, u will feel he is e worst. he cared for bb but not much. but its better den nv care at all. i m talkin abt all these is not cz he treat mi normal now but tts wat i been tinking when i go to drink tt nite.

though every1 signing for mi, i tink alot when i drinking all those alcohol. n all these tots came to mi. i duno y my reaction is so fast n firm when my fren bf ask mi permission to giv him a slap. i said no firmly. i been talking abt his bad things n feelin heart broken n yet i so protective of him when things happened.

maybe i hold too much hope in him tt result in my thinking.
maybe i expect him to change alot to my ideal him in a short period.
maybe i been grumbling too much n never look at e small details/changes he made.

to him, he aldy changed. frm a flirt guy i noe frm day 1 to a family guy now. oni 3yrs. n he been goin ard to hav fun since sec sch. it been over 10yrs. how could i expect him to change to a 100% family guy in 3yrs. i tink i oni can wait for time to pass. slowly he will b better each day. like tt time we quarrel badly, i did see he improve abit. juz giv him time ba. while i juz lead my usual lifestyle now. though i grumble alot, i tink i hav to learn to b calm n be my 'single mum'. juz pray tt my bb noe how i been thru n appreciate mi when she is old.

like my 4th sis said. grumble so much for wat. u chosen e guy urself so u b responsible for ur life. i seems to make e wrong choice but too bad, i choose it i take it. q sad to see myself lidat now but i hav to learn to b contented. i gonna go back to work v soon. hope n tink i will b better once i m back. cz i can b w my frenz liao. juz tt i will b v blur w e work haha..

kk i shall stop here.. so hapi tt she havent wake up yet. if not i oso cant write tt long. thx everyone hu made comments. i noe u all cared n worried for mi, but i m ok. to him, yes he is not a 100% husband n father but i hav to b contented for e little changed he made esp with his type of character. now i m thinking abt e fortune teller said abt mi. cz his parents went to temple to get e prediction for e family. mine actually not tt gd. a couple of things hav to b extra careful, which there is one tt i duno i can do it anot. i cant say out wats abt it cz it confidential but i hope i can bear w it thru out e yr of rat ba.

take care folks! cant wait to meet xl n hs on thur for shoppin n meetin up~! byebye

I WAS HERE @ 11:42 AM l 0Comment