Saturday, April 26, 2008

songz

柠檬草的味道
借口
擦身而过
我怀念的
我真的受伤了
爱哭鬼
你
洋葱
我恨我爱你
你那么爱她
最近

juz went kbox w colleen.. sang q alot of songs.. abv are some tt are meaningful. some made mi cry there as well.

so tired.. finally i made it till e weekend, had a v hard time to force myself not to b affected at work, yet the stress lvl is piling up till i cant breathe at work.
hate to countdown to my day.
i was yearning for this day to c changes n surprises from him 1+ week ago.
yes he giv mi a BIG surprise. so big till i duno to thx him anot.

e oni best bday i ever had i guessed its oni last yr. n tt is history n i noe it wun repeat. cz no matter wat he can do now, nth can change my mind.
when there is chance to admit it, he denied. to me, admitting to ur mistakes = u still hav hope. e advisor still can say he dun admit cz he wan this marriage.

damn piss off with her. i nv believed in her.
she nv fall in love thus she duno all these n giv stupid advises.
so what she is advisor, i still dun giv her face n stomp off aft screaming at her. i had enuf. reali enuf of everything. when things happened, e 2 criminals denied everything. everyone tink i m crazy. they will have their retribution. esp her. i will swear tt i dun mind cutting short my life but i will haunt her even aft i die. she will b cursed by mi till she died horribly one day. yes i sounded scary but tts e result of getting warnings yet refused to listen and still acting innocent in front of her frens. this kind of ppl deserved punishment one day. i do not nid to do anithing cz i believed in retribution. both of them will never b able to live with their conscience clear.

i've lost all hopes in him. i dun giv a damn even he showed concern when he noe tt i fell sick ytd. when he has e responsibilty to care for mi he din. he juz noe how to tear my heart apart again n again. or shd i say, he shared all his love w tt slut. i had enuf. reali enuf.

i dun tink i deserved such a life. everyone hu noe mi by person shd noe wat sort of person am i. i shouldnt b leading this kind of life at all. i had done enuf. so let mi leave with my bb peacefully if u still hv tt conscience for ur family. stop my suffering and let me b reborn.

u asked for time to change but these 2weeks it shows everything. i kp quiet all along. since e day i moved out till i back here, i all along knew sth is outside. but i choose to kp quiet cz i waiting for u to end it. how terrible i been feeling when i try to hug u to slp when u finally log off ur game. becz i noe tt i m not e oni one hugging u now. how much care n concern i m trying to show u but u didnt appreciate it cz all ur mind is on WoW n her. how much doubts i been controlling to say out when u trying to hide sth frm mi. i m not dumb, i told u before. my senses is very accurate. i noe ur char at e tips of ur fingers. wat would u do if u reali wan someone back and wat would u do when u hav a new target outside, i noe it by heart. but u just want to try ur luck. but luck can b used up 1 day.

ur luck might not end now. as in luck with gals outside. but for luck to kp a family going is gone. completely gone. bcz u nv cherish it at all, u still wan to have fun outside. i m tired. let me go with our bb. she will n she must be by my side one day. pls do not stop mi. pls do not make mi hate u even further. yes, to get 2 person to b married requires fate but our fate is up. e email tt jas sent is supposed to tell u to cherish ur wife n stop fooling outside. yet u send it to her, tellin her tt love nid courage. damn ass.. y would our fren send us such things if its meant to encourage u having fun outside.

nvm, wrote enuf.. v v tired, i nid a long rest. yet i hav to b strong for my bb. again i m forced to b more matured n independent. wondering y ppl at my age r much more fortunate den mi. but i noe tt thigns happened for a reason.

take care folks

I WAS HERE @ 3:48 AM l 0Comment